Day 80 -- Mindfulness

I was back at Mayo Clinic in Rochester today, this time for my younger daughter, who saw a dermatologist.  Yes, she saw my dermatologist.  And, yes, I set up the appointment.  I'm to the point where I know doctors in about a half dozen specialities at Mayo.  I'm thinking of writing a "Mayo for Dummies" book!!!  My daughter is fine, well, at least we know what we're dealing w/ and can treat it.  She has Dermatographism, which is a form of Urticaria also known as chronic hives.  Basically when she gets dry skin and scratches it, her body releases excessive histamines that result in hives.  Some prescribed antihistamines and thicker moisturizers should do the trick. 

After her appointment, we headed to the mall.  Browsing the shelves at Barnes and Noble, I found the book "The Miracle of Mindfulness" by Thich Nhat Hanh.  In it, he gives daily examples of how we need to be more mindful or conscious about our daily activities.  For example, he said if we're washing dishes then we need to only wash dishes.  It's not a time to be rushed through so that when we're done we can have a cup of tea.  Or, if we're eating a tangerine, we need to only eat the tangerine.  The man who absent-mindedly places one slice after another in his mouth misses the pleasure of its juices.  I understand this concept.  It's similar to the Be Here Now principle that I encourage my students to follow when they're giving their speeches.  No matter what's going on in their lives, I tell them, all that matters is the seven- or ten-minutes that they're in front of their audience.  So I decided to practice what I preach throughout the rest of my day.....to be mindful of what I was doing as I did it.  So as I was driving, I was completely aware of the bright, beautiful sunshine and my sleeping daughter smiling beside me.  Yes, she was smiling in her sleep.  That's true contentment.  I tried to be mindful while walking the down after we got home, but I found my mind wandering.....a lot.  Wandering to what needs to happen for the remaining three weeks of the semester.  What needs to happen for the two days that my other daughter will be in the hospital later this month for more tests regarding her Crohn's.  I got so lost in my thoughts of the future that I completely missed the clear night sky and all the Christmas decorations.  I wasn't walking the dog as I walked the dog, and as a result I missed the joy of everything around me.

I was mindful as I met Michael's family and viewed his body at his wake.  I was conscious of learning that I had one of his sister's in my class several years ago.  Strange that I wasn't aware of this before.  A unique, last name like Wichtendahl should've resonated w/ me.  I apparently wasn't very mindful when she was in my class, although as soon as I saw her in the church, I recognized her as a former student.  I was extremely mindful as I looked at Michael's sallow, sunken face with the deep gash in his forehead that three weeks of healing and excessive make-up couldn't erase.  He looked older than his 19 years and older than I remember him just three weeks ago.  I'm not sure going to the wake was a good idea b/c now, instead of his goofy grin, I see his stoic face.  They didn't even try to give him a smile.  I remember the mortician didn't give my mom a smile either.  People who smile all the time in life should be shown smiling in death.  I want to be cremated with my ashes thrown from a lighthouse. Anyone who needs to see my dead body for reality to sink in should get to me before the incinerator does.  Michael was wearing one of his favorite caps w/ sunglasses resting on the bill, just as I'd seen him wear three days a week for two months.  That made me smile.  They also had a video he made playing in the vestibule.  He was lip-singing to the song, "Don't Worry, Be Happy."  That made me laugh.